Depression Worries.

Hey Guys,

Well this is kind of just a personal account from me you can read this if you want, you don't have to but anyways here goes.

Yesterday I had my first ever depression you could say attack in a while...I had a good morning and then I went into Sixth Form enjoyed my lesson of Sociology. Then everything just turned to pot, my mood just changed in seconds people were bumping past me and it really annoyed me which it wouldn't normally...my handbag hit against a few people by an accident and I just felt so embaressed which topped my mood off even more.

I had to get the bus home alone, which was awful but I just couldn't wait to get home and then I got on this really busy bus and by this time I just wanted to break down and cry. I rang one of my friends just to confide in him and honestly the things I was saying...I've never said in ages since I've been recovering from my past with my mother.

I was saying things like is life really worth it, Why does everything always go wrong for me? Why am I so clumsy all of this running through my mind. I literally didn't want to be alive and this scares me the fact that I didn't want to be alive and I wasn't having any doubts about it...I hadn't felt like this in so long. In fact I never wanted to feel like this ever...again.

It wasn't until I got in the house I felt like I was in my safe zone and nobody could hurt me, then all my positive feelings come back the fact that I've got my family by my side and leaving them could be the last thing I ever do. I had a bath and watched finding nemo things to take my mind off this attack I was having.

I feel better today but just needed to get it off my chest it shows that you can really stop yourself from doing something stupid by just thinking positively.

This ever happened to you before?
If it has don't be afraid to email me? I'd love to hear other stories and people who are in the similar boat to me.

Charlie Bear x

Twitter: @Charliebear166
Email: charliebearlewis@outlook.com